...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
