Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
