More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Randomize
