do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Randomize
