she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
