Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize