We got so high we made milksteak
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
