it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
high people should be assigned attendants
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize