What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize