dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Randomize
