Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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