Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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