Kiss
Puke
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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