we have pet lesbian snakes
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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