She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
