Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
