One girl and one boy is just not enough.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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