In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
