I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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