how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize