i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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