She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
