it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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