True but thats because hes a fetus.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
