Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Randomize
