Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
