then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
