My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Randomize
