Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
