yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Randomize
