The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
