She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
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