it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
