So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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