I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize