Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
