So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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