Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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