i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Randomize
