Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
