he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
