I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
