They should really pass out barf bags in church
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize