Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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