Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Randomize
