mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
