i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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