Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
