hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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