She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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