Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
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